Stupid Gate

The night is still young, but it’s looking like halloween in Southern California is mildly different than it was back in Toronto. For starters, it’s hot here. I have memories of putting on long underwear first and my costume second. My favorite costume as a kid was Spider Man in a winter coat. But that’s no happening here. Oh no - you’d die out there. I think a mask alone would be overkill.

Also, this may seem trivial, but I remember going door to door asking for candy. That doesn’t seem to happen here either. I wasn’t the strongest math student, but I think this equation is pretty simple:

Gated Community = No Trick-or-Treaters.

There is a huge sign by the grocery store that reads “Bring Your Kids Here To Trick-or-Treat!”. I didn’t think much of it at first, but now it’s completely clear why you’d take the kids to Ralphs for some candy - It’s 7:00 here, and we haven’t had a single kid to the door. Not one. Apparently the gate is actually working… and of all days for it to keep people out. Jess went to the trouble of, umm, drawing a pumpkin, and we’ve got a few bags of candy ready in case some kid manages to infiltrate the defenses. I don’t get it - that gate is completely for show. People come and go as they please… It’s not stopping anyone from getting in. Wait a few minutes, someone will open it and you can just drive in. And if you’re on foot, you can just reach over and unlock the pedestrian gate. I’ll save you the trouble - the code is 1144. It’s nothing more than a pain in the ass.

Update:

Nope, not a single kid. Not one. I even went outside first thing this morning to see if the pumpkin was still intact… it was. I mean, seriously - what kind of Halloween is it if you don’t find your pumpkin smashed on the road or with its face kicked-in the morning after? A sad one indeed.